Witnessing an utter waste of life.

Perhaps it is because I’ve passed the venerable age of 40 and I’m becoming grumpy at more things more often.

Perhaps it is because I recall a time before home computers and instant messages when hanging out with someone meant you were actually face to face with them.

Perhaps it is any number of reasons that I cannot tolerate being around people who are wasting their time.

In one evening at a pub I witnessed a disturbing scene. Don’t get me wrong, I see good in socializing in a pub. Socializing with friends over a nice pint is a time honored tradition. This particular evening, however, was wrong in a Lovecraftian sense. That’s how wrong it was-Lovecraftian Wrong.

There was one person sitting alone, drinking and mumbling to herself (that’s fine, I talk to myself too, Shut up! No! You shut up!. Ahem) . A couple sitting watching the TV (ok, so they like to spend more money at a bar rather than staying home and doing the same thing. I’ve done that too) and a few business types talking about how to make the next hundred thousand (yeah so I’m jealous…). Ok, everyone needs to blow off steam, that’s why I was there, to unwind a bit with a colleague. Sure. But then came the discussion between two grown men about Twitter. Wrong, wrong, wrong.

After hearing about how Stewie Griffin and Brian tweet and how the one guy gets over 1,000 tweets a day the individual said that he followed the Dali Lama. It was “the” Dali Lama! “It’s amazing that he can, like, talk about like enlightenment in 140 characters!” The statement acted as a koan that woke me to my immediate situation.

I was sitting amongst a group of people who were doing nothing. They were becoming nothing. They were tricking themselves into mimicking activity but all they were doing was avoiding living life. Worst of them all was the one who lived life through 140 characters from a 1,000 different people, some of whom were not even real people!

I’m not a Luddite. I enjoy my computer and the occasional Facebook conversation. However, when playing “Black Ops” becomes an acceptable example of “hanging out” with someone and when 140 characters can represent enlightenment to someone, its time I check my baggage and move on.

Rather than “listen” to the Dali Lama’s 140 characters, sit an meditate for 2 minutes!

Rather than playing Black Ops and screaming at someone through a headset play D&D and scream at them face to face (more likelihood of punches being thrown!)

Rather than finding sleep in a pub create something. Paint. Write. Play. Imagine. Indulge. Just don’t be defined by gadgets and the latest “apps”. Fucking Hel people…you only have so many days on this pimple in space! Do SOMETHING!!

I know I am.

My sketchbook project

I had a blast contributing to the Sketchbook Project.

Here is a link: http://webzoom.freewebs.com/lkkeane/ARTBOOK001.pdf

 

Have fun!

 

 

When old perspectives die and unnatural ones Become.

Everyone has moments in their lives when they look back and think “Wow, what the fuck was I thinking!? I’m such a different person now”. Our ability to do that shows that we are capable of changing our perspective and understanding about who we really are. We have the capability to Become something more than we are. The problem is many times who we Become is still rooted in the traps that reinforce the assumption that we are not Sovereign, that we must bow to the collective good (this could be “community”, “religion”, “society”, “local sports team”, etc.). The past year I did not have a single “Wow, what the fuck was I thinking!? I’m such a different person now” moment. None. What I had were nearly daily moments of “Wow, what the fuck am I Becoming!?” There is something beautiful and dangerous when one begins to dismantle the influence of Others on oneSelf. With out a personal set of rules and ethics one can be left adrift (note: misplaced compassion does not qualify as ethical to me). However, with Discipline, Inspiration, Will and a deep sense of Mystery one can realise they are, in Essence, Unnatural and Sovereign. To all of you who strive to Become I send you all my best wishes. To those who are content and complacent I say…what are you waiting for?

Just not as smrt (sic) as I once was I guess….

I told a very bright friend yesterday that I was reading Ayn Rand.  He, being quite adept in the realm of  philosophical discourse, asked why I would bother, her philosophy was horrible.  I replied that while it might be true that her philosophy is not as intellectually stimulating as the material he is interested in, her notion of “selfishness” is applicable to everyday life in a way that contemplating the meaning of consciousness endlessly, for example, is not applicable.  He looked at me with a blank stare.

I used to believe that knowledge for the sake of knowledge had value in and of itself.  However, I feel I must qualify that now and say that knowledge for the sake of knowledge is good, knowledge that can be applied to one’s life in a way that changes who one is, is better.  Complex theories are great but do they do anything? Can they be used in some way other than to perpetuate even more complex theories?

I heard a wise man on a podcast say once that the statement “It works in theory but not in practice” indicates that it was not a good theory to begin with.  Once I would have disagreed with that.  Now I see the wisdom in that approach.  We are all here a short time, shouldn’t we be learning and doing?

The Isolate Beauty of Snow Flakes

This morning I was waiting for the train to get to work.

I don’t like to wait inside the shelter, it reminds me too much of cattle stuffed into some kind of strange glass holding tank.  I opted to stand outside in the heavy snow fall instead.

I watched the snow gather onto a dark green metal box (housing communication diodes and whatnot no doubt).  I looked at the mass of snow and thought how pleasant it looked.  While it looked like a uniform mass it was, in fact, made up of a myriad of individual snow flakes.  I mean obviously it was but actually looking at the snow in that way was interesting.  We say “its snowing today” not “millions of snow flakes are falling on the city” thus emphasising the mass of snow rather than the individual flakes.

The snow flakes that fell directly on the heavy green box (what is in there anyway!? It is much more Mysterious not knowing I suppose) melted instantly like some strange frozen meteor plummeting to a molten green earth.  The flakes that hit the amassing snow lingered until hit by another plummeting meteor.  If I looked closely I could make out the individual points on the flake.  They were quite beautiful.  However, I realised two important points.

1. The flakes are only beautiful when view individually, isolated from the “snow”.

2. The only way to really see their beauty is when they are magnified dozens, hundreds of time.  Looking only at the surface offers only a surface beauty.

So I offer you this question: what can you do today to distance yourself from “snow” and how far can you magnify yourSelf to fully appreciate your Beauty?

Wooden Odin and St. Olaf’s Magic Squishy

I was very honoured to be able to present a paper in Trondheim last week. While there, I was hoping that I would be able to immerse myself in Norway’s pre-Christian history.  Sadly,  I could only find Odin, in the form of a brightly coloured hand carved wooden statue, sitting hidden behind sundry tourist crap.  Rather than the inspiration of Odin or the strength of the Jotun I found cute little bulbous nosed trolls and St. Olaf.  St. Olaf stands upon his platform, looking out to all that he helped to found.  However, from the ground level it looks like Olaf is holding a squishy: St. Olaf, Patron Saint of  Sugary Liquid Goodness.  Anyway, here are a few pics.

Stone cold

Blood, sweat and tears

St. Olaf's Magic Squishy

A Basket of Heads

Outside the Palace

Panic in Trondheim

Bus Crazy or Bus Wisdom?

I was on the bus a few nights ago.  I was standing by the door and noticed a woman sitting to my left.  She was likely in her early or mid 30′s.  She had a ridiculous smile on her face…almost glazed in its presentation.  She lifted her hand to her head.  She plucked a piece of hair from the back of her head and twisted it between her finger and thumb.  She then put it in her mouth.  I could not be sure but she then either ate it or licked it and dropped it on the floor.  She smiled and mumbled something to herself and repeated the process every few seconds.

After watching this for a while I thought of how seers, shamans, and prophets are seen as separate from the rest of society.  Did she hold wisdom?  Was her internal dialogue one of ecstatic joy?  My final assessment was she was just nuts.  I love the bus; it’s better than TV.

A Few Fotos from Ireland…

Sadly, I had no sacrifice with me

Last stop....for EVERYONE!!

The Vikings are coming!!

Irish Virgin Behind Bars

Fota Island

The Norns in Dublin

The Cliffs!

Jelly Baby, Plastic Leprechauns, and the Yes Vote.

After spending two weeks in Ireland I have returned with many fond memories.  I have also returned with a few WTF memories.

WTF memory #1: I met Jelly Baby in Kilkenny while waiting for a bus.  This poster speaks for itself:

“Top professional pool entertainer David “JELLY BABY” Holt -as seen on TV- presents an evening of entertainment…(here)…”Jelly Baby” is so confident he is offering a four shot start (carry on rule) from the break for £10 per game upwards

“50 shot start for the ladies !

“Including trick shot exhibition.

“‘I’ve seen the rest, but Jelly’s the best’ – Jimmy White”.

WTF memory #2: Ireland, like other places in the world, is in a recession.  Things are not great for the once mighty Celtic Tiger.  One thing that will never be in any kind of recession is the abundance of tourist crap that drips and oozes out of what seemed like every store on the island.  Seriously, how many plastic leprechauns and Guinness towels does one person need!?

WTF memory #3: The Republic was going to vote, again, on a referendum on the Lisbon Accord.  I can’t comment on whether a yes vote (stay with the EU) or a no vote (go it alone…simplified but you get the idea) was right for Ireland (they voted yes this time but voted no the first time…the powers that be “suggested” a yes vote would be best for all the second time around).  All I can say is that nothing spoils the beauty of a country like thousands of YES signs and NO signs affixed to lamp posts, fences, and the occasional leprechaun.  It is unfortunate that Eire had to endure a second round.  My taxi driver in Dublin said that people were tired of it…I can relate…we had a certain referendum in the not too distant past too.  I won’t even begin to comment on THAT one!

All in all it was a great trip but it made me appreciate the life I have in Canada…where the majority of streets are marked with signs and babies are not usually gelatinous!

When Reason and Individuality Rear Their Ugly Heads to Smash the Happy World of the Occult Idiot

After over 20 years working within the occult cosmology I have believed some pretty crazy and random shit.  Observe!

I’ve believed that Arch Angels are literally beings created by an unmanifest creator.

I’ve believed that when called, elemental beings will take their place and guard against unwanted forces.

I’ve talked to trees, birds, cows, dogs, cats, rabbits, clouds, mountains, insects, the sun, the moon, the sky, the stars, rocks, and even people with the belief that they understood my intention.

I’ve tended shrines for people with diligence and sincerity.  Three teaspoons of honey, stirred twenty one times clockwise in black coffee brewed exactly at 5:25 AM.  Taste the honey first.  Don’t drink out of the same cup.  If you quiet your mind you can feel the sanctity.

I’ve conducted complicated rituals with the assumption that they would lead me to better understand myself and my “True Will”.

I’ve given people advice through tarot readings because they wouldn’t listen any other way—though in the long run they never listened at all.

I was reticent to use the inverted pentagram in ritual until I read Lon Milo DuQuette’s description of the use of the averse pentagram in his book The Magick of Aleister Crowley .  Since Lon said it, it must be ok (no offense Lon!)

And on and on and on. And on.

The one common thread to each of these examples is that it was someone else who informed me of what I needed to know—someone else’s views that I adhered to.  The other common thread through most of them is the insistence on denigrating or at the vary least, lessening, the faculty of reason and rational thought.

You are thinking too much.

You are too academic (said with vitriolic sardonic contempt, at least occasionally!).

Why do you have to label everything?

Just go spend some time in the woods, it will clear your mind.  Get out of the city for a while.

While I have no doubt that rationality can be overbearing if not kept in check, why does most of the occult world seem to think that rationality and common sense are vices?

I recall reading a chapter in Transpersonal Psychologies by Tart.  It was in the early 1990’s that I read the book.  Up to that point most of my reading came from Llewellyn and Weiser so this was an interesting deviation.  The point of this meandering is that there is a part in the book that discusses “floaters” that you can see “in front” of your eyes.  These floaters are deposits in the vitreous humour of the eye.  In the text Tart states that these are not visions of the element of Air (or something to that effect).  Who the hell would have thought that someone would think that these floaters were some vision into the basic elements of reality!?  I have to think that more than a few people had asked that question to be included in the book.

I recall a time working in an occult shop in Ottawa that a young woman came in and said she had a problem.  I asked what it was.  She said that when she walks under a street light it goes off.  Also, she used her electrician boyfriend’s voltage tester and she had a negative energy flow.  What could she do?  I said that the lights (high-pressure sodium lamps) cycle and turn off (caused by a loss of sodium in the arc—ok I just looked that last part up now!) and that those voltage tester are meant for something with a little more juice.  I said she doesn’t have negative energy.  She would not believe me…she KNEW that she did.  I sold her an aerosol can of Fast Luck (or something equally ridiculous) and sent her on her way.  Since that experience I have seen someone say almost the identical thing several times on various occult forums.  Where does this idiocy stem from?

In the same shop someone said to me they wanted to do a binding spell.  Being the fledgling self initiated  Wiccan I was back then I asked why she wanted to do that (for those who don’t know it is a common belief that if one binds an individual the binder and the bindee—now I’m making up words—are linked in some “karmic” way).  The young woman replied that her boyfriend is physically abusing her.  I asked her if she had called the police.  She said no, she didn’t want to hurt him.  I sold her and aerosol can of Fast Luck and sent her on her way.

These stories could go on for days.  After 20 years I’m left with only one question: what the fuck is wrong with these people!?

The various avenues and alleyways of the occult world hold untold beauty and terror.  But at some point one must sit down and ask: This is what I believe but does it make sense?

Not everything can be explained by rationally analysing it, especially in the world of the occult.  However, I can guarantee that if more people would face reality and think for a moment rather than acting on faith, instinct or impulse there would be a hell of lot less aerosol cans being sold and there would be more idiots off the streets (or at least fewer around me!).

Here is a little experiment and it’s not even an occult thing so you don’t have to worry about your eternal soul burning in Hell.  Next time someone pops off with words of convoluted occult wisdom simply look into their eyes, laugh, and ask the secret question of the Sphinx: “What the hell is wrong with you!?”